Some Journeys Are Meant to Be Lived All at Once

Some journeys aren’t meant to be paused — they’re meant to be rather fully experienced, breathed in, and lived through in one flowing story. Finishing Abbey’s Way brought a strange mix of sadness and exhilaration. Over the course of nearly a year, I walked its winding path across shifting seasons, moods, and mindsets. Unlike other hikes I’ve done, this one felt different. It taught me differently. It offered insights I hadn’t expected, and gently asked for a kind of presence I wasn’t always able to give.

Breaking the walk into stages taught me something important: I don’t want to hike like that again. The momentum got lost, the magic faded between the pauses. There’s something powerful about pouring yourself fully into each step through blisters, storms, and all. But even with the stops and starts, there was a quiet gift in it. Time. Time to adjust to wild camping. Time away from everyday responsibilities. Time to grow confident in the untamed. That, too, was part of the lesson.

The ancient legends whispered from the ruins of the four abbeys and echoed along the trail, wrapping the path in a timeless story I now carry within me. It’s only now, with the final steps behind me, that the full story has come into view. Not just the story of Abbey’s Way, but the unfolding of my own journey too.

There’s a particular kind of magic in this landscape. It is the kind that inspired the first Scottish muse, that once pulled humans into the land of fairies. It’s a land of poets, storytellers, and dreamers. And I felt that magic more deeply with every step. Now, I know that was the true purpose of this walk: to reawaken the artist within me. The part that longs to write, paint, and create again.

Each stage was a chance to tell a story. A story rooted in experience, because only what is truly lived can be fully expressed. It’s just the beginning, but it’s the beginning I’ve been waiting for. Each part of the trail felt different, and each video I created helped me grow. That growth is most visible in the final video, the closing chapter of a journey that changed me.

I’m deeply grateful to the path itself and to the unseen companions, the fairies and forests, who joined me along the way. I hear you now. And I’m ready to let you speak.

First SOLO camping in WINTER – How did it turn out?

In February I have attempted my very first winter camp SOLO.

I didn’t know what to expect and in all honesty I was a bit nervous. Only a week or two before storm Eowyn run through the region, it was still quite middle of winter which meant trees didn’t have any leaves yet, plus the path wasn’t heavily forested either and so I wasn’t sure I will find suitable safe enough place.

If curious, come with me to find out how it all turned out at the end.

Feeling grounded in Scotland deepening lost connection

Visits to an old homeland are slowly turning from challenging experience, where I see slipping myself into old patterns, into opportunities to observe the person I have become and am still becoming.

Recently I have attended reunion from my high school after almost 20 years. We are supposed to have such reunion in 2 years and this was meant to be deciding how to make it happen, which I don’t think we got to actually plan, but that’s besides the point.

I haven’t seen some of the people for twenty long years. We all grew, aged, went through life experiences. We all changed in some ways and stayed the same in the others. It was an overwhelming yet joyful experience. I loved most of my high school years and I loved people who were part of it, despite our differences or disagreements. But I am not the same person I once used to be. Or maybe I appear to be on the outside how I behave, yet the inner me feels completely different and I wander how many of us experienced such throughout the evening.

One of my classmates asked me if I am looking forward to return to Scotland. I paused for a second. Yes, I definitely do, my life is here, this is my home now. I answered strangely even to myself, that I feel rooted or grounded here in Scotland.

What does it even mean?

I have had my ups and downs with this country, similarly as I have my ups and downs with Slovakia, but the truth is I feel connected to this land. I don’t know why and I find it strange at times, but that is the truth I feel in my heart. I am still not in the place I feel I am supposed to be, but spirit or call it what you will of this country brought me here, somewhat randomly.

It has never been my true intention to come here, yet since I was 18, looking back I see the path always leading here, no matter what direction I would take.

After a decade living here different struggles came to the surface.

I am realising I am and always will be in between two places, having two homes, one which shaped me and another one which helps me to become who I truly am. That is the root and connection I strongly feel here. When plane descends in Edinburgh and I see hills, the sea or bridges from the window, I feel immediate peace and calmness spreading through my body. I am still not sure what is the reason for me to be here, but I know this is the place helping me to figure it out.

Here I reconnected with nature on a level I don’t think I have ever experienced before.

I had moments in Slovakia, where I felt home in the hills and forests on countless trips I have experienced with my family, friends or throughout the school, but I don’t think I would be able to understand this deep connection if I wouldn’t come here. I am starting to recognise, that the deep connection I have with not only Scotland, but as well with my  birth country is forming miles away from it.

Life in the small town in Scottish countryside, is helping me to connect the dots, the places, all the experiences I went through into unique map of ones life, my life.

I surely loved the time spent in Edinburgh, but high cost of living, constant noise and business were my main struggles of past 5 years which prevented me to dig a bit deeper. Prevented me to reconnect with the part of myself which in bursts of energy was trying to speak while I was growing up and visited nature, when pandemic hit and now when I moved out of Edinburgh.

It is an authentic part of what does it mean to be woman or a man connected to this part of themselves. Our connection to the earth and nature. It is ancient vaguely remembered memory of our ancestors, wise intuitive women who were persecuted for the awareness of such connection. Awareness every woman possibly feels deep inside on conscious or subconscious level. Journey some of us feel pull towards very strongly, because society built on current values is disconnecting us all from ourselves – the nature we are.

I feel as by moving out of Edinburgh I have started a chapter of my life, where I can explore this connection deeper. Something I tried in past few years, but practicalities of life, constant rush and need earn living (which is still a struggle, but in different ways) were standing in the way of true deep connection found in solitude, in nature.

Solo hiking West Highland Way in Scotland

This trip was one of the most important things I have done in my entire life. I took me a while to process it and even longer to actually make this memory. I still haven’t even write a post here about it. It’s all coming it’s all in me waiting to be put out into the world, remember the amazing moments on this journey. But for now here is a video where I tried to capture the experience.

My running strategy has to change

Last year in May I have run half a marathon. When comes to running journey it has been so far the biggest achievement and I knew there’s going to come a day when I will have to face an injury. I just didn’t know it’s going to be so soon.

Maybe I shouldn’t run the half marathon already as I experienced sores in my heel. I pushed through hoping that stretches will help, but the amount of running plus job mostly standing on my feet ultimately brought me to face the fact I will not be running marathon I have signed up for in autumn 2024 and maybe I won’t be running at all for a while.

After summer I stopped running for 2 months in hopes my feet will heel.

Running is one of few activities I have found to be helping me not only gain clarity but as well feel somewhat happy in past few years. It is a dopamine boost after all, sense of accomplishment and break from otherwise somewhat routine in life. Just thought of possibly not be capable doing such anymore was quite crushing. I still didn’t get over the fact even while writing these word.

I was very excited about new big dreams of running finally my first marathon in Scottish highlands and hopefully get into more trail running which could maybe ultimately lead to ultramarathons. The subtle pains in the heel intensifying as more I run made me realise once again I have to put my dreams on hold.

Patience with the plan is certainly one of the biggest lessons I am learning in this life.

I run 5k race over bridges in Edinburgh in November 2024 and sporadically have been running since, but I am still not able run straight full 5k when training. As soon I do so the pains are coming back. Still I was hoping to run the marathon in 2025, but I am starting to be realistic now that it will most likely not be possible.

Recently I have seen an interesting project of one YouTube creator (I try to find the source and reference) who run 5k every single day of the year. It made me think, that maybe I should stop focusing on distance this year, but rather on everyday activity.

I can not start with very first day of the year as I am still on the path of reaching 5k through Heart zone training, but I think now I have something to look forward to. Once I am finished with 5k training I would like to do this running challenge and run 5k every single day (unless hiking and camping). Just the habit of every single day movement would likely be a life changing experience.

So this is me thinking about plans for 2025 when comes to running.

What about you? What are your plans for the new year?

Running half marathon this year

Beside the fact that my mum used to say I loved running as a kid next to her bicycle when going to local grocery store, I have never been a runner. I did okey running in school, but never really thought of running as ‘my’ thing. There always been better ones and I didn’t necessary found a passion and enjoyment in it at that age. It took three decades for me to start some serious running.

The process was slow. I have started with podcast building up to 5k. What was meant to be achieved in 9 weeks took me six months. Starting and stopping, weeks of breaks in between and coming back to the beginnings. Part of me stopped believing in myself or the fact I can actually achieve something. Sometimes it takes just one big traumatic experience to reach rock bottom, other times it takes hundreds of little comments, little ugly actions from outside world and some significant verbal or emotional abuse to reach the point where one looses confidence in themselves.

Beside therapy, serious looking inside of myself and reframing my view of the world running became a final tool pulling me out of dark years of recovery from difficult relationship. I decided, not consciously at a time, to take my life back and start to be writer of my story again. Fighting with inner demons which were over and over pulling me away from keeping up with running I reached my first 5k running. It was an incredible feeling of achievement as I have never done such thing before. My body felt good, my mind clearer and sense of happiness started accompany my days once again.

Over the years I stopped running and picked it up again, similarly as my first 5k podcast done over 6 months rather then 9 weeks. It doesn’t bother me anymore. Today I know I will always be able pick it up. Even though I need to come back a little I will get there if I keep running.

I signed up for my first 5k running race in 2022. I almost gave up a night before. Old familiar voice creeped in once again, trying to persuade me what a fool I am to thinking I can run a race in my thirties. I felt very stressed out and cried my eyes out experiencing serious meltdown until I finally fell asleep. I wished to have there someone to support me, but my close people either weren’t available or didn’t know I even signed up or they just simply decided it is not worth it to be standing an hour by the fence and cheer me up. I was upset about it, but it was one of those moments when I had to decide to cheer myself up and not to be waiting for someone doing such thing for me. As much I wanted to share this experience with someone close I was doing it for myself after all.

What an experience!

I was on the cloud. The cheers from strangers around, the energy within running crowd. We were all there to run and so we did…up the hill…lake…views of the sea and down around Arthur Seat…last few meters…I’ve made it! My first race ever.

I want to experience this again.

So I signed up for my 10k in October.

Summers are hard for running. The air becomes more humid and I find it difficult. Every year I stop running somewhere during the summer. I never run 10k in October as I was not able to train for it. I have learned to deal with ‘failure’ by now and reframe it into something else. I was just not ready yet. I signed up for 10k run in May of next year. As it started approaching I tried my best to train, but as usual it is not always as easy as one would like. By the time the run came I still haven’t run full 10k, I was maybe on 7k, but I decided going anyway.

What an experience once again! The energy, the crowd, the achievement.

My first 10k! And I run the whole time. I was exhausted after but full of endorphins as well. This time I could share the experience with a friend, so it made it even more special.

I want more of this!

Half Marathon it is next year.

I gave myself a goal of one race every year as more might be a bit too much at the moment. There is only few months left at the time I am writing this. By now I have reached my 5k as I stopped running for about 2.5 months in summer, as usual. I am doing bridge to 10k at the moment and hopefully I will manage my longest run before Half Marathon. If I manage this it might mean I’m running the full marathon next year. But let’s not get ahead of myself.

Slowly, but I’m getting there!

Hiking Pentlands Way in Scotland (we didn´t make it)

So we went on a journey of adventure, the journey I had in mind for about a year. Finally, I packed my backpack and we set on to walk ´Pentlands Way´ in Scotland. Not many people walk this path it isn´t even very famous, but everyone in the area knows it and walked at least parts of it if being ever in Pentlands. I do love these hills. Sanctuary from busy and noisy city not far from Edinburgh.

Determined to walk the path despite bad forecast so much in need of nature and break out of Edinburgh after so many months spend here in this year better said only here.

The journey was amazing but wasn´t easy. Nature showed us its very best and nicest the first day yet its worst the second one. I came back home sore from blisters and heavy backpack yet so happy inside smiling energy into the world. We had to cut our journey short because weather conditions were too rough and difficult at the end.

Come with me to walk this path together and maybe you set on your own one day. Maybe we will manage to walk it till the end next time.