What is it I am complaining about?

Living in the city can be a bit of a challenge sometimes. Maybe it is not even the city as our (my) lucking ability to switch off. I am certainly a person who is way too sensitive which makes me get easily overwhelmed and guard myself a little more, prone to withdraw. Maybe that is exactly the reason why I tend to seek quiet away from everyone and everything sometimes.

Do you know that feeling?

Everything seems to be too noisy too much too many choices too many people. In a way I do love both noise-quiet light-dark city-village…one reminds me how lucky I am to have the other. Yet I am growing to be old for city life. Maybe I just need a break maybe I am getting ready for a different phase of my life.

More and more I long for long deserted forest walks for exploring quiet forgotten places.

I need to be careful though because one big lesson of my life is being happy with what I have and don´t get lost in dreams about possibilities which are not ´just now´. Little daydreaming though is okay sometimes so I guess today I can give myself permission :D.

I do feel a bit guilty in this very moment while I am writing this as if I would be abandoning Edinburgh a city which gave me so much and taught me to be who I am.

I am slipping lately into memory realms about times I have experienced before, times which feel to be as a different life what I am glad is behind me. Yet all those good or bad experiences I had nice and little less nice people I met brought me exactly where I am today and made me who I am today and I will be forever thankful for that to all of them.

I guess lately I have been longing for ´work´ of my ancestors which is truly strange feeling. I do come from a family which has long history of connection with nature and people. There always has been somehow creative vibe but as well very technical and logical approach. I guess I am trying to find my own place once again as many times before and noise of the city is not always helping. Yet we can only work with what we´ve got and Edinburgh is still far away from very noisy and huge cities. It is very green city too with so many bits of nature which one can explore.

So what exactly is it I am complaining about? 😀

I guess I am not alone wishing to experience a life where I get out of the house and am on the edge of the forest. Life where I can run through the meadows whenever I please and smell all the flowers. But as well life filled with not always easy every day work yet somehow meaningful connected to very source of ourselves, to nature.

Maybe one day.

Slowly I am implementing small bits into the life where I am just now. I get to go to the forest, pick up some berries or mushrooms, bake muffins (such a discovery :D), listen to people, play with kids, enjoy time with friends and some new people coming into my life…

For now, I have a privilege to explore at least nature in and around the city. Maybe in some time I get to go farther to the mountains once again and do my so long planned hiking trips. I guess past months were for many of us quite reflecting ones. I am greatful to be healthy have a roof above my head work for others find some time to be creative. It can be struggle sometimes because of the demands of the outside world finances which seem to always avoid me for a very good reason (that is certainly for another story).

Do you have these moments where you are same time grateful for what you have yet that never happy voice becomes a little louder?

Maybe you understand and maybe not…Either way it´s okay… Today has been a little philosophical….

Is there something you are thankful for right now where you are at? Or the wander how life could be different is lauder these days?

Fairy Hunt

When I moved here what I was most taken by were stories about mythical creatures and fairies srill fairly lalive among the people. They are very proud for this heritage which I find fascinating and somewhat similar to my own culture where many fairy tales about mythical creatures still live among the people. Maybe not in such extend as here yet I remember stories to be told as a child or attending events and festivities closely connected with old traditions.

With all this mythical knowledge once you see the beautiful nature here or wherever else there you can let your imagination go and meet fairy behind the trees.

I have few stories of my own while frowing up. There used to be a tree close to my parent’s field. I spent hours talking to it and back then I believed it is talking back to me. Sounds crazy right? Yet I don´t think it was that crazy at all, because as much I learnt there are different parts of our personalities and probably this one was one of them projected by my ´child me´ into a tree. I gave her even a name – Agatha. It certainly was my good wise fairy always providing comfort and good advice.

My mum taught me hug trees when I was little, because they carry beautiful energy from the source. Every time we would go to the forest she would hug trees I would follow until I entered ´cool´ age and found that to be somewhat crazy. I am realizing just now how much these small rituals meant and how they created my strong connection to life, nature and everything alive.

Walking through a beautiful forest thinking that there are tiny creatures protecting its beauty gives me joy and reassurance that not all is lost yet that nature will always find a way. Little painting I did here inspired by nature was very free flow illustration of possible worries and yet freedom of the fairies. It´s more of a study then final piece yet I enjoyed every second of the painting. Come with me for a little fairy hunt today.

Do you have any fairy stories of your own? I would be happy to hear 🙂

Artists inspiration during midsummer day 2020

It is not long from midsummer day. Every year even if I forget it somehow comes to my awareness. This year wasn´t different.

I was moving flat which took a lot of my attention. Around 24st of June I started to be fulfilled with this new strange energy. It is every year around this time I feel as everything renew itself.

I moved a flat so obviously things started to be new I basically am starting over, but there was something else into it. I felt this deep connection to something inside of me.

Forgotten.

As I was looking for few things into the flat I don´t even know how suddenly I ended up on the e-shop of one talented artist. She creats these beautiful symbolic goddesses and seeing those pictures I just fell in love.

IMG_9163There was so much symbolism which just was so deeply talking to me connecting with this part of me I have forgotten about. Each goddess would represent certain aspect of mostly womanhood.

I spent hours just reading about them and connecting with this mythical symbolism.

At the end I ended up ordering few pictures after thorough consideration which ones are for me. Those pictures just created certain frame in which I finally saw myself and woman in general. I felt a wave of inspiration a hope that these little women who got such a huge responsibility to carry human’s desires and dreams, bringing them to their own self will remind me of my own path. Journey towards never ending inspiration and understanding which is deep inside of each of us.

Once again I heard calling of the nature because not only one goddess was connected to nature and wild animals. This calling is deep and different to anything I have ever experienced before.

Art (in different forms) and nature.

Only two things which made complete sense throughout my whole life. Every midsummer day directly or no directly is reminding me of this calling so strongly that is impossible not to listen.

So I created this little video about goddesses which came into my life during midsummer time of 2020. Enjoy! 🙂

 

How to boost creative process?

Recently I came across with interesting advice (precisely it was at the channel of this guy), which is ´draw the same thing every day for one year´

It felt resonating. Go have a look for the close explanation, but basically what you need to do is pick one object and draw it every day. Not only your technique will improve this way, but your brain gets used to inspirational process.

Why only one?

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